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Tales from the Coffeeshop: Mavroyiannis spills the fasoulia on Preznikone

IT TOOK seven years for former negotiator, presidential candidate and top diplomat Andreas Mavroyiannis to muster the courage to break free from the hold Preznikone had on him and expose his former master’s lies about what happened at Crans Montana.

For seven years, without a hint of shame, Mavroyiannis repeated and gave legitimacy to the long list of lies about the collapse of the talks served to us by Anastasiades, but some ten days ago his conscience got the better of him and he spilled the fasoulia.

In an interview on LegalMatters Podcast, the former negotiator found the guts to inform us that Nik I, during the negotiations in Crans Montana, met Turkey’s foreign minister Mevlut Cavusoglu and suggested the idea of a two-state solution.  

The former prez had told this to Mavroyiannis, at the time, but the latter, loyally backed the liar prez. Not that coming clean sooner would have changed anything. Nik would have labelled Mavroyiannis a liar just as he had done to Cavusoglu and the late Archbishop Chrys II, to whom he had confided his support for partition.

In the case of the hapless Chrys, after his passing, the shameless Nik claimed he had misunderstood their chat about the two-state solution because the treatment he was receiving for cancer had affected his cognitive powers.

A PITY that Mavroyiannis had not spoken while Nik was still prez, because the latter would have set up an Authority Against Lying to investigate allegations of being economical with the truth, just to prove that he had nothing to fear.

It would serve the same purpose as the Authority Against Corruption, which incorruptible Nik set up to show us that someone as pure as the driven snow, would welcome any investigation into his activities.

Don’t be surprised if his protégé Prezniktwo sets up an anti-lying authority, because he seems to be facing more and more accusations of lying. He could put one of his cousins from Paphos, who is still awaiting an appointment, in charge of investigations.

Someone could argue that this would be a futile exercise as all politicians lie, the only difference being that some, like Nik I, are true heavyweights of the sport, and do it much better than others.

THE CYPROB has been back in the news recently after a long absence. On Monday the mandate of the UNSG’s personal envoy Maria Angela Holguin expires. It turns out that the Turks were not lying in saying that her mandate was for six months and that Prezniktwo was, in insisting there was no time frame.

A month ago, Tass news agency reported that Holguin’s mandate had been extended by three months, which was an admission that there was a deadline. But Tass’ info, probably fed to it by the government, was factually wrong because the UNSG had given no extension.

If he had, the government would not be telling us now that Antonio Guterres would decide the next steps, depending on the report Holguin would give him. It is government policy to keep the lie that there is still a chance for progress, going; that Nik is exhausting every possibility to ensure a resumption of the talks.

This is for public consumption because the UN knows that he has no interest in pursuing a settlement. He reportedly turned down Holguin’s proposal for a four-party conference, which Turkey had agreed to, preferring reciting his poem about the resumption of the talks and UN Security Council resolutions.

THE STATUS quo is unsustainable, the Prez informs us at every opportunity while going out of his way to preserve it. Holguin said that he knew how the process could be unlocked, implying that he had no wish to unlock it.

Despite this, the government, according to hot air spokesman Mini Me, “will carry on undertaking initiatives” so that “the necessarily positive climate could be created for the resumption of talks.” Of course, for this to be possible the Turks must show the “sincere political will” that, so far, only our Prez has exhibited.

Initiatives that lead nowhere and nobody apart from Mini Me and Prez’s family friends take seriously will be the new Cyprob strategy. Perhaps the Turks will eventually be moved by this unwavering display of our Prez’s “sincere political will” exemplified by meaningless initiatives.

UN SPECIAL Representative Colin Stewart finally gained entry into the UN Hall of Infamy, joining a very long list of illustrious diplomats that included, Perez de Cuellar, Alexander Downer, Alavaro de Soto, Boutros Boutros Ghali, Kofi Annan, Gus Feissel and Espen Barth Eide, to name a few.

Stewart was targeted by the government for insisting that the government should allow the 27 migrants stranded in the buffer zone for two months to go to the Pournara reception centre. Prezniktwo took a tough stance on the matter, aware that keeping migrants out of Kyproulla would help boost his sagging popularity.

Stewart had no right to interfere in our internal affairs or to tell our government what to do as this was not part of responsibilities, said the Prez, whose minions leaked to the press that “Nicosia was unhappy with Stewart.”

It is all part of the scapegoating the government is preparing for as we enter final act of the Cyprob. Apart from Turkish intransigence we also had to deal with hostile, anti-Greek UN officials completely disregarding our sincere political will for a settlement.

THE GATEKEEPERS of the UN Hall of Infamy, Edek, was quick to rubberstamp Stewart’s entry. In an announcement after the Prez’s attack on Stewart, the national socialists of Edek said: “The suspicious role of Colin Stewart is proved again – Edek is vindicated for demanding his recall.”

Will the party also demand the recall of UNSG Antonio Guterres, who endorsed everything Stewart had been saying in his report on his Good Offices mission, released on Wednesday. The UNSG expressed concern about the militarisation of the buffer zone, its violations by both sides, and censured the government for violating international conventions regarding the treatment of migrants.

If Guterres is not careful he will soon follow Stewart into the Hall of Infamy.

DISY deputy Nicos Tornaritis, who flopped as a mayoral candidate, has decided to turn his attention to suppressing free speech. He has undertaken the initiative of making the writing of offensive or insulting comments, the propagating of fake news, the making of threats and the distributing of obscene photographs criminal offences.

These had been civil offence until now, but if Tornaritis has his way they will become criminal offences carrying prison sentence of up to five years. It may not be his intention, but if such an amendment is approved, it would make people who write columns for a living jobless.

Would our establishment write that Preznikone is a liar when I run the risk of being sentenced to five years in prison for this? It might be factually correct, but it would still qualify as an offensive/insulting comment.

And another thing. Would the attorney-general have the power to prosecute the government for propagating fake news – something being done all the time – or is it just poor hacks that Tornaritis is targeting with his fascistic amendment?

THINGS cannot be going well for Odysseas in the proceedings at the supreme constitutional court, otherwise he would not have played the victim card. “The attorney-general would have been happy with my annihilation,” he told the court on Tuesday, which was a bit rich coming from him.

He had been on a mission to annihilate both the AG and the deputy AG, reporting them the anti-corruption authority, while publicly questioning their honesty, competence and integrity. It is a bit cheap of him to complain now that he is being given a taste of his own medicine.

DISY MEP Loucas Fourlas, the man with the political brain of a 15-year-old, (I might as well be offensive now that insulting people does not carry a prison sentence) started his second term at the European Parliament with a major triumph for suffering Kyproulla.

In a broadcast, live from Brussels he announced that the European People’s Party to which he belongs, will issue an announcement condemning Turkey on the anniversary of the Turkish invasion. He has done the country proud.

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