My wife walked out and took our daughter when I lost my job over boozing

DEAR DEIDRE: THE school bus drops my daughter off outside my bedsit every morning, so I can see her from a distance.

She’s the person I get out of bed for every day.

I was married for 16 years and our daughter is 12.

Our marriage broke down during the pandemic when I lost my job and we struggled financially.

I got another job but my wife asked me to leave.

I thought it would be temporary but despite my pleading with her, she didn’t want me back.

I now have contact with my daughter twice a month, in a public place, and normally it’s with her mother there.

The court decided on that. My daughter doesn’t look happy and doesn’t speak to me in English.

She speaks Farsi because my wife is Iranian. I can understand a little of what she says but not everything.

My ex-wife is afraid I’ll run away with our daughter but that’s not something I’d ever contemplate as I know it wouldn’t be the best for her.

I’m 47 and things are out of control. I lost my last job because I turned up drunk to work.

Now I’m on benefits and my elevenses is a bottle of wine. I drink to forget about everything I’ve lost.

I want my wife and daughter back.

DEIDRE SAYS: If your wife says it’s over, you can’t make her feel something she doesn’t feel, but there’s no reason why your daughter can’t be in your life.

You’ll be giving yourself the best chance to see her if you sober up and try again to find a job.

Your daughter needs stability, not a father who doesn’t look after himself.

Read The Unexpected Joy of Being Sober by Catherine Gray to get you started.

My support pack called Help For Job Hunters will give you lots of ideas about staying mentally positive without having to reach for the bottle.