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Inman: All you need to know (and more) about the 49ers’ offseason

Inman: All you need to know (and more) about the 49ers’ offseason

As the 49ers open training camp, here are all the wild first pitches, tractor commercials, weddings and -- oh yeah -- roster moves from the last five months.

SANTA CLARA – So long, offseason. Say hello to another 49ers quest for that elusive sixth Lombardi Trophy.

This season marks their 30th anniversary since Steve Young tightly clutched that silver prize, the same trophy Patrick Mahomes twice snatched from the 49ers in the past five years. Surely you haven’t forgotten last season’s unhappy ending, when the 49ers went overtime and lost to Mahomes and the defending champion Kansas City Chiefs in Super Bowl LVIII.

To refresh your memory of what has unfolded since that loss, here is a reminder of this offseason’s 15 landmarks, some of which are noteworthy and some of which were simply downtime fodder:

1. THE AIYUK SHOW

Brandon Aiyuk claimed he nearly signed an extension in the spring, but the market changed, the goalposts shifted, and, thus he had “fun” on social media while gaining a lot of yards after post. He even made it on TMZ leaving LAX. Those 15 minutes of fame were more than he got in the Super Bowl. Requesting a trade a week before camp cast further shade on this union.

2. MARRIED LIFE

Brock Purdy and Christian McCaffrey secured their long-time commitments and married their respective girlfriends. They each got their girl, but it’s McCaffrey who also got a contract extension as well as the Madden 25 video game cover. Not to jinx anyone but let’s toast to a lifetime of happiness — and to the start of #ringseason.

3. NO DAD BOD

Fred Warner and his wife, Sydney, welcomed baby Beau into the world in March. Warner didn’t put on any baby weight, and, unlike past offseasons, he happily said he didn’t require treatment on his knees this year.

4. TRACTOR PULL

As Purdy capitalized on his growing endorsement power, he brought right tackle Colton McKivitz along for the ride. Actually, it was McKivitz driving Purdy in a John Deere commercial filmed near a San Francisco park. McKivitz’s opening line: “Going on a road trip. Gonna need some onion dip.” Purdy’s response: “That’s beautiful, man.”

5. THE SHANASTACHE

Once pictures leaked from McCaffrey’s grand wedding to Olivia Culpo in Rhode Island, coach Kyle Shanahan was spotted with a dapper mustache. The Shanastash is art. Super Bowl pundits, however, surely critiqued Shanahan for not finishing off a whole beard.

6. COWBOY UP AT TEU

George Kittle hosted Tight End University for a fourth straight year in Nashville. Joining in was Dallas Cowboys quarterback Dak Prescott, who has lost to the 49ers three seasons in a row. If you can’t beat George, join him.

7. NETFLIX SHOW

Deebo Samuel joined Kittle and three other NFL receivers for a Netflix show called, well, “Receiver.” It includes footage from this past season and debuted July 10. It does not include Travis Kelce because, well, Taylor Swift’s boyfriend said: “ I’m way over the reality s—.”

8. PROMOTION TIME

Steve Wilks was fired as the 49ers’ defensive coordinator three days after the Super Bowl. Nick Sorensen’s promotion into that role was announced May 21, after initial news leaked March 2.

9. ‘DISRESPECTFUL’ EXIT

Defensive tackle Arik Armstead felt “extremely disrespected” when the 49ers sought to reduce his salary to $6 million. So they released him after nine seasons. He found a golden parachute in Jacksonville, where former 49ers general manager Trent Baalke reunited with Armstead on a three-year, $51 million deal.

Meanwhile, fullback Kyle Juszczyk accepted a pay cut, saved the 49ers’ cap $1.75 million, and now he enters his eighth season with the franchise — their longest-tenured player on the roster with Armstead gone.

10. OTHER DEPARTURES

QB Sam Darnold (Vikings), DE Clelin Ferrell (Commanders), WR Ray-Ray McCloud (Falcons), TE Charlie Woerner (Falcons), TE Ross Dwelley (Falcons), LB Oren Burks (Eagles), DE Chase Young (Saints), DT Javon Kinlaw (Jets), DE Randy Gregory (Bucs), CB Isaiah Oliver (Jets).

11. COMMITMENT ISSUES

The 49ers brought in a respectable string of free agents but did not commit more than a two-year contract to any, splurging the most on defensive ends Leonard Floyd ($20 million) and Yetur Gross-Matos ($18 million). One-year deals were enough to lure linebacker DeVondre Campbell ($5 million), quarterback Josh Dobbs ($2.4 million), and cornerback Isaac Yiadom ($3 million).

12. FIRST-PITCH ISSUES

Despite all the attrition among the San Francisco Giants’ wounded pitching rotation, they knew who not to call back to their mound. Warner and Samuel simultaneously threw wild ceremonial first pitches on Opening Day, and Purdy followed suit a month later with a high heater Kyle Harrison somehow snagged.

13. FATHER-SON CONNECTION

Terrell Owens showed up at Levi’s Stadium and watched the 49ers’ coolest-ever pro-day tryout for local prospects. His son, Terique, was not drafted but showed well enough to sign, participate in the offseason program, and earn a spot in training camp.

14. TRENT WILLIAMS APPEARS

The offseason’s best news was that left tackle Trent Williams did not retire. He made a cameo at the mandatory minicamp and exchanged bear hugs with Nick Bosa, among others.

15. SIMPLE HAPPINESS

Cornerback Charvarius Ward marveled at his visits to Zimbabwe and South Africa. “They don’t have a lot like we do in America,” Ward said. “They don’t stress about the things we stress about, like the fancy cars and clothes and everything. They are just happy to get by every day. … A lot of them are super poor, in poverty, but their spirit was way up here. That’s what I love about Africa. Definitely see myself going back over there to help out once I retire, and towards the latter end of my career. I want to help my people out for sure.”

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