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My husband works every hour of the day from home and has no time for us

DEAR DEIDRE: SINCE the pandemic, my husband works long hours.

He is based at home now, which I thought would mean he would have more time, not less.

But he’s always doing overtime, eats three meals in front of his computer and is constantly on his phone checking work emails, even when he’s not at the desk.

I hardly see him any more because he works every hour of the day.

I’m 40, my husband is 45, and we’ve been married for 11 years. We have two young daughters.

In the early years we were head over heels in love, but now we never see each other.

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I didn’t think it was possible to miss a man who is living in the same house as you.

By 8am, he is working at his desk and when I go to bed, he’s still there.

And I have noticed there isn’t much of a relationship between him and our children any more.

He never asks the kids how they are doing in lessons or takes them to after-school clubs, and we have not had sex for more than a year.

I’ve tried to speak to him but he brushes me off, saying he’s working hard for our future.

But surely the present is just as important and he’s been neglecting us for a long time now.

I worry that once my kids become more independent, I will lead a very lonely life.

How can I get my husband back?

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DEIDRE SAYS: If your husband carries on in this way there may not be much of a future, not for your relationship, or with his children.

It’s time to talk to him again and insist on some boundaries.

Can you both agree to set aside some family time? Say no phones at the dinner table and that he turns off all tech at 8pm?

And perhaps he could take your children to one after-school activity a week?

Tell him you miss him and that you want to spend time with him.

Living as housemates won’t do your marriage any favours.

My support pack Standing Up For Yourself will help you get the message across to him.

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