Sex with my wife and her cousin was so good, I don’t think I can return to monogamy
DEAR DEIDRE: Sex with my wife and her cousin was so good, I don’t think I’ll ever want monogamy again.
I’m a man of 29 and my wife is 27. We’ve been married for seven months and we’ve always had a wonderful sex life.
Her cousin is 25. I hadn’t met him before our wedding day, nor had I ever experienced intimacy with another guy. He’s great fun and has always been close to my wife.
We have a one-bedroom flat and he asked whether he could come and stay while he was on a training course nearby.
The plan was that he’d sleep on our bedroom floor as there was no room in our tiny lounge.
I’d cooked us all dinner and it was such a hot night we all got pretty tipsy on the wine quickly.
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The three of us got on like a house on fire with the conversation soon turning sexual. He even admitted he’d always wondered what it was like to go with a man.
I told him I’d always been happy with women but was open to new experiences.
I think the conversation turned us all on so when we went to bed my wife made a B-line for me and we kissed while her cousin watched.
It felt completely natural when he joined us in bed and started kissing me until we all enjoyed a new kind of sex with one another.
I’ve never felt so turned on. My wife enjoyed it too and she’s asked her cousin to join us again next weekend. I never thought I was gay but possibly bisexual.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: Perhaps you are. My guess is that the alcohol allowed you to feel confident enough to accept that initial kiss, which led to you being bicurious.
Some couples love threesomes but you need clear boundaries about what is and what isn’t acceptable as a starting point.
So often feelings of jealousy kick in, one partner starts having romantic feelings for the third person and insecurity can become an issue.
Also as this man is family, you don’t want a fallout which ripples out through extended family.
If you’re going to bring third parties into your relationship, it would be better for you to treat this experience as a one-off with your wife’s cousin and read my support pack called Thinking Of A Threesome before you take the next step.