Is my wife trying to score points against me after I cheated?
DEAR DEIDRE: I cheated on my wife after a bad time and now I think she’s looking to score points by doing the same to me.
I’m a man of 40 and I lost my job and then my dad passed away. That was three years ago.
A female colleague who also lost her job was there for me and we supported one other, which turned into an affair.
After six months, I got a new job and I felt so guilty towards my wife. I told her what I’d done and she was prepared to forgive me.
She’s 37 and we’ve since had a daughter who is now 18 months old.
Sex is scarce though and since our daughter was born, we’ve had sex three times and each time, I’ve had premature ejaculation.
I checked my wife’s phone and found some guy was messaging her — and she wasn’t discouraging him. I love her but I feel like she’s leaving me.
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DEIDRE SAYS: Your wife was willing to forgive you after your affair but if intimacy between you wasn’t back on track, that indicates that you both had issues recovering from your infidelity.
Tell her you love her and you’re willing to do what it takes to rebuild your marriage and make a happy home for your daughter.
Premature ejaculation is a common problem but easily fixed. My support pack called Want To Last Longer explains how.
If things don’t improve, seek help from a couples’ counsellor through BACP – British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy, (www.bacp.co.uk, Tel: 01455 883300).
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