I'm an adult and moved back in with my parents. Our relationship is better because of it.
Courtesy of the author
- Four years ago, I moved back with my parents.
- I don't have to pay rent, which has allowed me to save money for a trip to Asia.
- Also, being at home with my parents has helped my career, something I wasn't expecting.
My plans after university were simple: move to South Korea and never look back. Unfortunately, a pandemic scuppered those plans, and I ended up moving back in with my parents midway through my final year of university.
Four years later, I'm still here and wouldn't have it any other way.
There are financial benefits
I admit that my situation is better than most. I personally don't pay rent, nor do I pay for bills or groceries — whenever I try to, my parents refuse to accept my money.
The financial benefits of living at home are self-evident. If you're saving on rent and bills, you'll inevitably find yourself with more disposable income. I, for one, have been steadily putting aside money from every paycheck and am getting accustomed to the idea of treating myself.
Whereas before, I felt guilty for frivolous expenses; I now don't mind indulging in the occasional pick-me-up purchase, nice meal out, or short break away. I've even saved enough money to fund a backpacking trip to Southeast Asia.
Living with my parents has helped my career grow
Money, however, isn't the only factor for my continuing to live at home. I always thought I needed to move away to establish myself professionally, but in a surprising turn of events, my current living arrangement has helped my career flourish.
I'm a freelancer, and my schedule is unpredictable at best and chaotic at worst. When my work commitments are at their most hectic, being able to split household tasks with my parents is a lifesaver.
Even during university, I found myself struggling to maintain a work-life balance. Any time left after classes and assignments was swiftly absorbed by cooking, eating, cleaning, and working out — my mental health was at an all-time low, and I had shockingly little restorative downtime. Never mind social engagements, I barely had time to sleep.
These days, my parents have taken over the cooking and, post-retirement, my dad keeps himself occupied with the household chores. After spending all day working, I can relax in the evenings, which makes for a happier and healthier version of myself.
I live in rural England, where public transport is notoriously unreliable, and I don't drive, but my dad is always willing to chauffeur me around when necessary. Without him, I wouldn't be able to take on as many projects as I do.
My relationship with my parents has gotten better
The biggest advantage of living at home, however, is how much my relationship with my family has improved.
My parents and I have never really gotten along — a mix of intergenerational and intercultural conflicts has stoked the flame ever since I was a child — but constantly being in such proximity has finally opened up the channels of communication, and we're in a far better place than before. At this point, I can't remember the last argument we had.
Moreover, most of my extended family, including my grandma, still live nearby, so I'm able to maintain my relationship with them, too. I know that when I inevitably leave the nest and start my own family, I'll be really grateful for the time I've been able to spend with them.
I always thought I needed to move out to realize my full potential, gain more freedom, and kickstart my career, but over the past four years, I've realized that I can achieve all of that and more while still living at home. I'm sure I'll move out eventually, but, for now, I'm perfectly content exactly where I am.