Javier Bardem will go to Canada and yell at Denis Villeneuve if he's not in Dune: Messiah

Everyone loves Stilgar. Paul Atreides loves him and his people enough to wage a holy war that devastates the known universe. Dune fans love him enough to adopt his awe-struck "Lisan as Gaib" pronouncement and shout it at people they like—like Hans Zimmer in the middle of his concert—six months after the fact. Javier Bardem even loves him enough to trek out to director Denis Villeneuve's home and fight for his right to play the character if he has to. As written!

Speaking of writing, Villeneuve told Deadline last month that he was "in the writing zone right now" on Dune: Messiah, the completion of the arc he began in Dune and Dune: Part Two. If Bardem isn't in it, he's going to start his own crusade. "I know that I’m in the book, so I should be in the script. If I’m not, I will be very angry and I will let him know. I will go to Canada," the newly-announced Cape Fear actor told Variety. 

Bardem then immediately softened his statement, but this writer isn't sure she totally buys it. The Mahdi will always be too humble to say he is the Mahdi, after all. "Seriously though, I totally love him. I adore him. Whatever he wants, and whatever he decides, it will be fine for me. Absolutely," the actor continued. "He’s one of a kind. He’s an extraordinary human being. Such a loving man, fun, funny as hell, and a real worker."

Ok sure, Bardem, but what do you want? "When he saw Dune 2, [my son] stood up in the theater and said, ‘That’s my dad.' But then at the end, he said, ‘But you haven’t had any sword fighting,'" the actor continued. "So now I have another demand for Denis Villeneuve. If there is such a thing as Dune: Messiah, please give me just a little sword fighting that I can show it to my kid." Ahh—there it is!

While the fate of Bardem's character—and his son's adulation—remain a mystery to those who don't have prescience (or access to Villeneuve's laptop), the director did have a little tease to tide us over until part three: "more worms." Consider this writer sold! No trip to Canada required.