Laboratory Director Tawnya Plummer Laughinghouse
“When I transitioned from Spelman to Georgia Tech, it was probably the first time in my life that I had a professor that made me question if I belonged or had what it takes. Previously, I was always used as an example of how students should study, and now, in my first chemical engineering class, I would raise my hand for a question and wouldn’t get recognized, or my question would be followed by, ‘I’m not sure I understand what you’re saying, Miss Plummer.’
“I was struggling with imposter syndrome before I knew what that was, wondering, ‘Have I just been in some dream world up until now? Am I not as smart as I thought I was?’ I would be in my room just knocking out homework problems, no problem, but I would get in class, and it was almost like I’d freeze up. [My professor] would be walking around the room, and I could not make my brain work. I really struggled through that and did not pass that class – the first time I had ever not passed a class – and this was supposed to be my major!
“…Sometimes you look around and wonder why you don’t see a lot of [people of color] in some positions, and it’s probably because of situations like this where we have such high standards but feel we cannot meet them. We don’t give ourselves grace. We assume, ‘This obviously isn’t for me.’
“…But I knew I could do it. I had to, number one, get out of my head and, two, realize not everyone will be a fan or in your corner cheering for you… As a young college student, it was the first time I ever faced [this situation], and it buckled me. It set me back until I realized that I could do it and that my worth wasn’t based on what someone else thought of me or my abilities…I went back that next semester with a new mindset and determination, and I passed that class with an A and moved on through the rest of my engineering classes.
“That [experience] really informed the type of leader I am and taught me how to make sure that everybody has a voice and feels like they belong. Looking back, I thought it was the worst thing in the world when I was going through it, but now I see it was exactly what I needed at that point in my life to understand that I’m meant to be here doing what I am doing. I learned to give myself grace. If I had pulled myself out of that STEM major, I would never have been managing a technology demonstration program for NASA that launched ten technologies into space.”
– Tawnya Plummer Laughinghouse, Director of the Materials and Processes Laboratory, Engineering Directorate, NASA’s Marshall Space Flight Center
Image Credit: NASA/Charles Beason
Interviewer: NASA/Tahira Allen