NFL Bets, Week 2: We all think that Rams-Cardinals line is a curious, right?

It’s not easy being a Rhode Island Scumbag. Or rather, it’s not easy being a profitable Rhode Island Scumbag.

Our new New England betting guide had big shoes to fill, and unlike his predecessor, flailed his way through the opening weekend. Where the Scumbag 1.0 would typically fly through September with an 8-1 or 7-2 record, his replacement jumped in confidently with a trio of two-unit bets and promptly lost all three. By significant margins, too.

That brought our former artist in residency to the group chat where he took a well-deserved victory lap.

“I know, I know, it’s one week and the article was very well written; I mean that was some Shakesperian [sic] level [stuff]; I haven’t been that locked into an article until Men’s Health released the new guide to building bigger lats last month. Pulitzer-level writing aside, it is the picks that matter. Chinz, a seasoned veteran at putting picks out that 100 percent will be criticized if incorrect made two very reasonable and smart bets. The new gunslinger slapped his c[Ed. note: c’mon man you know we can’t publish anything from this point out, it’s filthy. Just say the new picks were bad and move on so we don’t get fired].”

Well, noted. He also tossed out four plays for this weekend, leaving his self imposed prohibition from this column maxed out at exactly one (1) week. If you want to tail him because he’s typically surface of the sun hot before October, here are his locks: “New York Giants, New York Jets, Jacksonville Jaguars and a paycheck whopper of a bet on Tampa Bay +7.5.” But if you want to see if the new Scumbag can course correct, well, read on.

Welp, that escalated quickly. My baptism by fire as the new Rhody Scumbag went about as poorly as one could imagine. In terms of viral videos, it was similar to the Haitian hurdler circa 2016. Hamming it up for the cameras, pointing and smiling, working the crowd, and promptly face planting on the first hurdle.

The Original Rhody Scumbag actually felt the need to reach out to let me know how pathetic my performance was. Betting against a Mike Tomlin defense as well as putting my faith in a QB with tiny hands were offenses egregious enough to receive a verbal scolding.

I don’t want to deal with that again. I simply have to be better, and treat this exercise as a marathon, not a sprint. It’s not going to be easy digging myself out of a six-unit hole, but then again this is not for the faint of heart. Hopefully, I can learn from my Week 1 mistakes and restore some faith in the people. Here are some of the bets I’m hoping can turn my early struggles around.

USA Today Sports

New England Patriots (+3.5) over Seattle Seahawks (one unit)

Many people might look at last week’s New England victory over Cincinnati as a game the Bengals lost more than the Patriots won. I’m not one of those people. The Patriots came out and executed their game plan to a tee. Eliminate Ja’Marr Chase, grind the clock down with the run game, and limit mistakes on offense. Keion White looked like a true difference maker, and Christian Gonzalez quickly re-established himself after only playing in four games last season.

I’m optimistic that the Patriots can put together a similar performance against Seattle. Both the Patriots and Seahawks are currently dealing with weakened offensive lines. However, Seattle is also dealing with an injury to Kenneth Walker, a difference maker for them.

Both teams also boast similar strengths with good pass rushes and competent secondary play. Ultimately, I’m willing to put my faith in Jerod Mayo and the Patriots brain trust to turn this game into a rock fight. Plus, we have the ever popular West Coast team traveling cross country for an early game narrative. I’ll take the Patriots and the points in this one.

Sergio Estrada-USA TODAY Sports

Los Angeles Rams (+1.5) over Arizona Cardinals (two units)

This is a curious spread to me. I understand that a healthy Kyler Murray is great for the Cardinals, but the past speaks for itself in this one. Since 2017, the Rams are 12-2-1 against the spread vs the Cardinals. Those are Dynasty Era Patriots vs. the Bills/Jets type numbers. The Rams defense did a commendable job containing the Lions top weapons last week in prime time. Cooper Kupp looks like the Cooper Kupp of old. Kyren Williams is healthy and ran wild against the Cardinals both games last season.

Obviously Vegas sees something I don’t, because I can’t comprehend why a team that blew a 17-3 lead to a Bills team reworking their offense on the fly is actually giving points to what seems to be a superior opponent. Yes, Puka Nacua is a big loss for the Rams, but their role players have shown that they can step up when called upon. This could be a trap game, but I’m willing to lay two units on the Rams being the superior team in this one.

Brett Davis-Imagn Images

Pittsburgh Steelers (-2) over Denver Broncos (one unit)

One of the worst decisions I made last week was to dismiss Mike Tomlin’s defense going up against an aging, hobbled quarterback with a new team. Swept up in my disdain for Pittsburgh’s offensive playcallers (who apparently still love to keep the NFL on their toes with questionable personnel decisions), I completely glossed over the fact that the top pass catchers for the Falcons couldn’t produce if their quarterback can’t get them the ball (or even have time to look their way).

This same defense now heads into Denver to face a team with similar issues on the offensive side of the ball. The Broncos allowed the most pressure to their QB in the NFL (44.9%) last week in their loss to Seattle. This could make for a long day for Bo Nix and co. with T.J. Watt wreaking havoc.

Additionally, Denver performed poorly against the run last week, and now have to deal with a formative run game led by Najee Harris and the explosive threat of Justin Fields. This matchup has the makings of a low scoring affair, which is why even though I have faith in the Pittsburgh defense, one unit should suffice considering it could come down to a field goal.

Last week: 0-3, -6 units
Season to date: 0-3 (.000), -6 units

Detroit Free Press

My non-scumbag picks for Week 2: Los Angeles Rams +1.5 at Arizona Cardinals (one unit), New York Jets at Tennessee Titans UNDER 42 points (one unit)

Well, I see our Scumbag friend is zeroing in on the trap that is having confidence in the Pittsburgh Steelers. As much as I respect that defense, I’ve been burned enough times on a week-to-week basis to know Pittsburgh only exists to make others feel bad about themselves, especially bettors.

Anyway, the Rams went out and nearly closed on the road, erasing a 14-point deficit to take a late lead against the Detroit Lions before losing the overtime coin toss and never having a possession in the extra frame. The Cardinals went in the other direction, allowing the Buffalo Bills to erase a two-touchdown advantage and eventually losing, in part, because Kyler Murray has yet to make a meaningful connection with the wide receiver drafted fourth overall.

Los Angeles’ offensive line and wideout depth is a concern thanks to injury, but the Cardinals don’t have the horses to exploit either. Maybe Murray levels up and wins a shootout, but I like the value here.

Jets-Titans puts a spiraling Will Levis in front of a defense in need of a get-right game. New York’s offense wasn’t entirely inspiring and the Titans, while not at San Francisco’s level, is better at stopping the ball than moving it.

Last week: 2-0, +2 units
Season to date: 2-0 (1.000), +2 units

Читайте на 123ru.net