Merry Chrismukkah: Interfaith families remix traditions for rare Christmas, Hanukkah alignment

For the first time, Erica Foster took her menorah on the road this year.

She, her husband, Tim, and their 3-year-old daughter, Olivia, made the 12-hour drive from Old Irving Park to Tim’s parent’s house in rural Maryland last weekend to celebrate Christmas — as they do each year.

But this year’s festivities will be different.

With the first night of Hanukkah falling on Christmas Day, it's the first time that Erica Foster, who is Jewish, is celebrating Hanukkah in a home where no one practices Judaism. Her husband grew up Catholic and is no longer practicing, but his family has traditionally only celebrated Christmas.

The start of Hanukkah hasn’t aligned with Christmas Day since 2005. It’s the fifth time the two days have coincided since 1910. The next time that will happen is 2035, then again in 2054.

“I think it’s really exciting,” Erica Foster, 34, said. “The idea of being able to celebrate both is awesome. Who doesn’t want two parties on the same day? But it is a little bit of pressure, because it is a balancing act of making sure that both are equally represented.”

Hanukkah, the Jewish Festival of Lights, is an eight-day commemoration of the re-dedication of the Temple of Jerusalem by the Maccabees after their victory over the Syrians. The small amount of oil left in the temple burned for eight days and was considered a miracle, inspiring the candle-lighting tradition.

Christmas is a Christian holiday celebrating the birth of Jesus that has also evolved into a secular family holiday consisting of giving gifts.

The Foster family will celebrate Christmas with presents under the tree and dinner, but, “once the sun goes down, [I’ll] light the menorah,” then, hopefully make latkes, Erica Foster said.

Tim Foster’s parents are open-minded to their daughter-in-law observing her religion’s holiday in their home. But their openness doesn’t mean the blended holiday will come without any confusion or loads of questions about the Jewish holiday.

“One of the things that I think people forget is that you’re never supposed to blow the menorah out,” Erica Foster said. “You let the candles completely melt and go out as they just run their course, and so I think my mother-in-law might be confused by that, or hesitant to let me have an open flame for hours.”

‘How do we celebrate both?’

The holiday overlap, sometimes referred to as “Chrismukkah,” is a microcosm of the decisions Jewish-Christian interfaith families regularly make, but it also presents a unique opportunity to better understand the two religions.

“There’s that challenge of how do we celebrate both,” said Dan Olsen, director of the Archdiocese of Chicago’s Office for Ecumenical and Interreligious Affairs. “If you have children, it’s like, what are we doing to share the face of the parents and their heritage, their culture, in those times while also retaining an identity within our own communities?”

“But it’s also an opportunity to learn about one another," he added. "What is Hanukkah? What is Christmas? When they come together, there can be a dialogue about what it is we do, and why, that can be real fruitful, so there’s a challenge but maybe a gift in all of that.”

Maris Garcia, who is Jewish, was initially squeamish about the idea of her husband, Antonio Garcia, wanting to get a Christmas tree for their home after their first child was born.

Antonio Garcia is Puerto Rican and was baptized Catholic, but his parents switched to a non-denominational church when he was young. He now views himself as mostly non-religious, but his enthusiasm for the secular side of Christmas has persisted.

The Garcias feel they've established “the most harmonious, commingled version” of yearly Hanukkah and Christmas celebrations over the years, and especially now that their 10-year-old son and 6-year-old daughter are being raised Jewish.

“It is kind of auspicious the way [Hanukkah and Christmas] falls, so it captures it well and maybe this year it does bring into focus a little bit more what we’ve worked to build or design in our family," Antonio Garcia, 45, said. "So in that regard, it’s reflective of the way our family works."

The couple said they've have found a middle ground with a wooden, architectural Christmas tree, and they light a menorah for Hanukkah. They’ve also made Christmas more about presents, while Hanukkah has become “more family-oriented, with different activities” and themes each night.

This year, about 20 members of Maris Garcia’s family visited their Irving Park home for an early Hanukkah party. Antonio Garcia’s family will then visit around a week later for a belated Christmas gathering.

For Christmas Day, the Garcias are staying home with their two kids and opening gifts from Santa in the morning, then relax until it’s time to light the menorah in the evening. Part of Hanukkah’s first night celebration also includes their children choosing a charity to which the family will donate money.

Hanukkah’s Americanization

Like Maris Garcia’s wince at her husband’s thought of buying a Christmas tree a decade ago, some American Jews might bemoan the “Chrismukkah” notion that has caught on in a Christian-dominant U.S. solely because of Hanukkah’s proximity to Christmas.

But Rabbi Steven Philp, from Mishkan Chicago, a self-defined “radically inclusive” Jewish synagogue, said the confluence of holidays should be worth celebrating.

The Jewish tradition has always been syncretic, adapting and responding to the culture around it, he said. Hanukkah is “a great example of this,” Philp said, noting that holiday traditions like spinning the dreidel, eating latkes, or potato pancakes, and sufganiyot, or jelly-filled doughnuts, are customs that were borrowed from neighboring cultures over time.

“With Christmas becoming such a pervasive feature in American culture this time of year, I think Hanukkah has responded in kind,” Philp said, pointing to the gradual proliferation of Hanukkah sections in retail stores consisting of lawn decorations and wrapping papers.

The Americanization of Hanukkah also signifies something deeper within Judaism, Philp noted.

“Hanukkah becoming such an important holiday within our calendar in response to culture is also a reflection of the degree of safety and acceptance that Jews have experienced in this country, which is unprecedented,” Philp said.

“I know we’re at a time where things might feel more frightening, and antisemitism certainly is on the rise," he continued, "but the fact that Hanukkah is present in big-box stores and the halls of government and classrooms and schools, I think, is a reminder of really the amazing welcome that we fought so hard for in this country.”