Too many kids and teens struggle with mental health crises. Adults can do more to help them cope.
Among high school students in 2019, 36.7% reported persistently feeling sad or hopeless in the past year, and 18.8% had seriously considered attempting suicide, according to the CDC.
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"Are you thinking of killing yourself? Do you want to die?"
The woman looked at me doubtfully and said: "We have to ask that?"
It was near the end of a Youth Mental Health First Aid course I was co-teaching at a Chicago elementary school, and the time had come to discuss how to respond to a young person in crisis.
The security guard who posed the question had been an active participant all morning, sharing insights into her daily interactions with students. But these two questions had turned this self-assured woman squeamish. “Wouldn’t straight talk about suicide put ideas into the minds of impressionable kids?” she wondered.
With the U.S. suicide rate at an all-time high, it's more important than ever to know how to ask kids these hard questions. According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, every 11 minutes an American dies by suicide. In addition, one in five adolescents experiences a major depressive episode each year.
Understanding how to get kids help is the goal of the Youth Mental Health First Aid course. Like CPR, it equips everyday people with the knowledge and skills to identify young people experiencing mental health distress and provide them upfront support.
I've been a certified trainer of the course for almost two years and have taught the course to educators across Chicago. No matter the attendees’ backgrounds, they generally agree the state of young people's mental health is perilous.
Some have worked with kids who struggle with depression or substance use. Others have had firsthand experience with the impact of violence on children. A young mother came to one of my trainings even as she was trying to locate her daughter, who’d stormed out of the house that morning after an argument. The woman said she’d decided to still come because she wanted to learn how to be a more supportive parent.
At times, the act of helping can feel overwhelming. That's why we spend a lot of time in the course talking about hope and recovery. That notion of healing is central to physical wellness, but it's not used as much with mental health. It needs to be, though, because recovery from a mental health challenge is possible if a young person receives timely support.
A few good men needed
One thing I’ve noticed is how few men take the course. Perhaps this shouldn’t surprise me considering I was the only guy among some 30 aspiring instructors when I trained to teach the course.
I checked with mentalhealthfirstaid.org, which administers the program nationally. They confirmed that fewer than 20% of adults who take the first aid course identify as males — a statistic possibly explained by the scarcity of men in schools and social service organizations as well as the historical stigmas related to mental health among men.
Given the social challenges men face in America — greater number of suicides, more violent crimes committed and higher substance use rates compared to women — they need to be involved in what the surgeon general has called an "all-of-society effort" to improve youth mental health.
We need more guys to deliver a message to our boys: There's no shame in seeking help when facing a mental health challenge. Expressing emotion is not only OK, it can be a healthy coping mechanism.
One small but impactful thing men can do is become mentors. It sounds straightforward, but an important protective factor for a young person's mental health is having a positive relationship with a trusting adult they can relate to.
Another easy and effective thing to do is to learn youth mental health first aid. Certification trainings are typically offered at a nominal fee and require an eight-hour commitment. But in that time, we learn action steps that anyone can use to help kids in crisis and non-crisis situations.
It takes a village to raise a child, the proverb goes. In the case of America’s youth mental health challenge, it takes even more. We need every adult to recognize the signs and symptoms of young people experiencing a mental health challenge and be prepared to act.
B.E. St. John is a certified instructor of Youth Mental Health First Aid and a member of the executive team at Communities In Schools of Chicago. Go to the Mental Health First Aid website to find a training in your community.
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